Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Govinda! Govinda!

Why do we go to Temple? As for me, I go to get some mental peace. To sit quietly, away from the world and reflect on my deeds. Good or bad. We go there to have a dialogue with God about what we want or to complain about why we haven’t got what we want. We go there to reduce our suffering and to feel a connection with God. Temple is the least corrupted place where everyone is equal before God. It does not have any kind of discrimination. You believe in God so you go and worship him/her. It’s as simple as that. My last visit to Tirupati - the richest temple in the world changed my idea about visiting temples for mental peace. It actually made me think ‘Does God favor the rich?’ Yes, this is what I felt during my visit to Tirupati last month.

I had been to Tirupati N number of times and the idol of Lord Venkateshwara here makes my faith in God stronger every time I go there. I always felt some kind of divine presence there. I always felt that it is God himself who is standing there and not the idol.

Generally, when you come out of temple your mind is very content and peaceful. Even my mind was at peace but this time it was the satisfaction or happiness of coming out safely from the temple. It was a long weekend and the weather was also good so we thought it was a good time to walk from Tirupati to Tirumala. It is some 9kms and 4000 steps to Tirumala from Tirupati. I had been to this place lot of times but this was the first time I decided to walk up. Thanks to Ashish and to Lord Venkateshwara for granting me my wish so I had to walk up. I was very impressed with the route. I mean it was all covered to protect you from sun or rain. There were lots of facilities on the way to take rest for sometime or to eat. What more I could eat hot and yummy idlis on the way. The beginning of the walk was really tough for me and I really wanted to give it up in the first 15 mins. But looking at my mom’s morale I thought if she can do it I can do it too. We took our time and made it in 4-5 hours. So far so good, but I did not know that having a glimpse of God will be more difficult than the walk up.

You struggle so hard to see God and at the end what you get is a 5-10 seconds glimpse of God and that too while being pushed from all the sides. Here it was pure business. The more you pay, the more time you get to spend with God. You have to be a special donor or a VVIP to get to see God peacefully. The temple is hardly closed for 2-3 hours. Finally I found someone whose working hours were more than my husband’s. Each and every part of the temple is pure business; the security guys, the guys distributing prasadam, police men… everyone takes money and does as you want. I was shocked to see the level of corruption at such a religious place. If people cannot be honest in a temple, can they be honest outside?

Day 1 we had bought some tickets and went for darshan. I really got irritated at the way people were pushing each other to move ahead. I actually had to stop few people from trampling my mom and my niece and had to remind them that God is not running away. The idol is going to be the same if they look at it before us or after us. The best thing (yes, ‘thing’ because they move only when you put some money in) there were the volunteers or the security guys who take care of the queues. They do nothing but just stand and watch. While walking in the so called queue, I noticed a big crowd far away and my father told me that it was the free darshan line. When we came out of the temple I just asked some of them out of curiosity and they told me that they have been in that Q for more than 7 hours. We were lucky to be out in 2 hours but again it was because we paid money. Why can’t normal people have a glimpse of God peacefully?

When the authorities do not let the God rest for even 3 hours why can’t they use some of the money earned to make things better for the people who visit the temple. Even if you want to spend money and buy the few Seva tickets(these tickets get sold out sooner than the time you take to blink your eyes) that are available, they can be obtained only through some recommendation. You need a recommendation or donation to get accommodation, darshan and even some extra prasadam.

The worst plight was of the senior citizens and the disabled people. They have a direct entrance to the main gate of the temple and they have a different time too for darshan.So far so good but that is it. Once they enter through the main gate, their Q merges with the normal Q at the main entrance of the sanctum sanctorum. I just could not stand our manner less and etiquette less junta pushing even disabled people to move ahead. I was really frustrated by this time. How can God discriminate between a follower who pays 100 Rs to see him and a follower who pays 500 Rs to see him? After all the pushing I was so tired and so eager to get out of the crowd that I forgot to thank God for whatever I have got. My mom had advised me to give some money to the security guys standing there so that he/she would let me stand there for few seconds to have few peaceful seconds with God but I did not feel like doing that in a temple. Finally, when we had the darshan it was the prasadam Q. My mom gave some money to the guy who was distributing prasadam and guess what we go lots of prasadam and that too it was enough for 6 of us. While I got just one small laddu, of course I did not bribe the guy.

This visit taught me the art of self-defence. Passing through a crowd of thousands of people and coming out alive was a win in itself. I felt victorious. They were in an equal hurry to get out of the temple and there was a mob pushing for that too. You spend so many hours in the journey and come so far just to push people and make a record of getting in and out for the temple in the least time? Getting in and out of this temple can be included as a task in some adventure game show.

I wish people could understand the real purpose of a visit to a temple. I wish God was given some more rest and we could actually get mental peace in the temple and not outside the temple. There was a Q even for putting money in the hundi and there too people are in a hurry to offer money to God before you. This was my worst ever experience at Tirupati and I silently apologized to God that I will never come to this temple again unless I become a billionaire or some VIP.

Next morning when my dad asked me to come for another darshan I actually got scared thinking about the crowd. But this time we had some VIP darshan. My aunt is a donor and she has some privileged darshan with her family. So this time I was feeling guilty that even I am using a special privilege to see God. But then I had forgotten to thank God in my last visit so I went along. This time we were out in less than 1 hour after spending some peaceful time in the temple and of course with lots of prasadam. It was enough for our lunch. Thanks to my mom and my aunt and the corrupt people in the temple I got to eat some very yummy food.

But I really want to know why God favors the rich who donate enough money to spend some good time with him and people like me are meant to stand in crowd for long hours just to catch a glimpse of God. Conversation or connection is out of question. And yes thanks to my aunt again for getting us a nice accommodation right opposite to the temple because of her donation. I always thought God was the giver and I am the taker.

Anyways, I came back home safely and vowed to go back to Tirupati only if I become a billionaire or if I have a BIG recommendation with me. We definitely need lessons in good manners and etiquettes.

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